“WORKING TOGETHER…ON COLLABORATION”
The Journey to Learn How To Work
With Others Took 3 Years…
and resulted in a book
In my lifetime, one man, Dr. C. William Keck stood out as a genius of sorts. Winner of the Velvet Hammer award and former President of the American Public Health Association, and now working closely with the United States and Cuba to encourage sharing of medical technologies, he is a man who navigates working with others with aplomb and it’s not an exaggeration to say, a sense of mastery.
Three years ago, I said, “Bill, you should write a book to share what you know about collaboration with others.” The effort to do so began then, a combined effort between Bill, his wife Ardith, and me.
Truly, helping write a book on collaboration was a reach for me, because I’ve never really thought of myself as a good collaborator; I tend to get upset by what others do, real or imagined, to me! I’m not patient, and although I try to be a good listener, I’m not sure I really am a good listener. Perhaps you can relate. By nature, after all, a writer is a pensive creature happiest when holed up in their own universe of creativity, with a cup of tea or small bowl of yogurt, making imaginings come to life.
But I thought, “This is my chance to learn.”
The structure we decided upon was to begin the book with a synopsis of Bill and his wife’s wisdom, then supplement it with interviews with 15 masters of collaboration, most chosen from the public health field, but their lessons are certainly universal.
So what did I learn?
The first idea of importance is a quote credited to the Helen Keller…“Alone, we can do so little; together we can do so much.”
I have to ask the question…do we really need the help of others to accomplish great things in life?
Harvard scholar, Dr. Yuval Harari says that it is human beings’ ability to create a shared vision and act in concern that has resulted in our success in all fields as a species.
Working with others takes advantage of their lifetime of experience, and skill sets we may not possess; we see things we hadn’t seen before, and thus can do things we could not do before.
The entire beehive of human activity works because we each do what we do well, and we utilize the specialized skills others possess- be they medical, mechanical, or other.
Simply put, working together with others works.
But to collaborate, we have to work well with other people. So how exactly do we do that?
BE A GOOD LISTENER
“Listening is the art of ‘being present’ to what someone else is saying,” said one of the book’s contributors, Mary Jane Stanchina, who runs a compact of many schools systems with the goal of sharing best practices gleaned nationwide.
MaryJane talked about passion and emotional connectedness to others as part of her understanding of how to be a good listener.
She suggested that we carefully consider what others say, and think about it a bit more.
Think of things from the other person’s perspective…questions like, “What conclusions would I come to if I held their views?” can be helpful.
If you are not sure you agree, take the time to think about it carefully. There’s nothing wrong with saying, “Let me think about it.” People actually do appreciate that you’re considering their views.
Dr. Keck expressed similar thoughts, “We all know people who have the reputation of not caring what others think or how they make others feel. That type of personality is not likely to foster good communications.”
INVEST TIME IN OTHERS
Investing time in others brings positive results on two levels: you’ll get better results in your collaborations and you’ll feel better about your interactions with others.
“Valuing others and getting to know others by investing your time in them does more than help you get better results; it affects how collaborative efforts feel to you,” said Keck.
It’s a simple formula; take the time to honor other people’s ideas and feelings, think about THEIR ideas, and you’ll find that your collaborative efforts work better.
Be slow to draw conclusions. Don’t respond too quickly with, “I don’t agree.”
These are easy things to write, but not so easy to do.
We may be tired, uneasy, overwhelmed with work, or simply disinterested. But seeing beyond ourselves and our own ego is the stuff of collaboration.
Dr. Keck summed it up nicely; “Simply put, by letting go of your need to be right or to have it your way, the flow of the group will be served.”
PUTTING OUR EGO ASIDE
The greater part of adult life is to clarify who we are, defining ourselves through choices; choices on what we will wear, choices on what we will eat, on what we will buy, on what we will think, and what we will do.
But the common denominator of all this is ourselves; our ego.
Good listening and collaborating with others is a matter of setting this ego down in its chair for a while. Yes, it’s going to drive the buggy, but it doesn’t have to drive it all the time.
And of course a related topic is humility, because it is through the gate of humility-realizing we are just one of many, each believing passionately in their choices- where we open our lives to the possibility of working effectively with others.
HUMILITY
“…ask yourself if you can see beyond your selfishness. The greater part of a human being’s life is determining in great detail what we believe in, what we think, and what we choose to do. It’s part of the process of defining who we are throughout our entire lives,” said Keck.
“But in a collaboration, you are far more likely to succeed by mastering the art of learning what OTHERS think and feel,” added Keck.
The technique in the specific is fairly easy- it requires that you act with humility by avoiding strong expressions of your own position while asking yourself, “How do others feel and think, and why?”
A useful checklist is:
- Ask their opinion
- Ask why they feel that way
- Ask relevant questions
- Take time to think things through—perhaps a day or more
- Consider the pros and cons of their views as you see them
- Consider how your views differ from theirs
- Come back together and talk about your thoughts on their views and ask for their response
When people see that your intent is to honor their ideas, they become much more tolerant of your foibles!
THE POWER PIE
Ricardo Martinez, MD, is somewhat of a Governmental guru, guiding the Federal government through quagmires including child car safety. His words covered the realities of politics, and it’s a different world entirely; the world of the power pie.
Look at the persons you are collaborating with as a pie, a pie like an apple pie cut into slices…the slices being people having a large stake in the outcome of your collaboration. Have you included all the persons, or representatives of the sectors you need support from?
If not, it can come back to bite you, and like pie, you might notice that bite.
What often happens is that entities left out will block approval or implementation of the idea, because they were left out.
Said Martinez, “All too often you find people that leave out slivers, and those slivers may have a lot of political power or they may be very influential. If they’re not involved in the process, you’ve got a problem. Be afraid of creating that problem.”
IS MARRIAGE COLLABORATION?
Ardith Keck, Bill’s wife, spoke of collaboration from a perspective she knows well…a successful marriage. She is no stranger to organization success, as the former President of the League of Women Voters and public service television show producer and host.
“Collaboration is a partnership, just like marriage. If you don’t collaborate, you “ain’t” got a marriage. There are a lot of people who are married, but maybe they don’t collaborate together-work together-because working together is collaboration. If you don’t work together, it’s not much of a marriage,” said Ardith.
“It’s a matter of committing fully to working with others effectively, and we hope this book can help,” said Bill Keck.
Resources: The book, “Working Together On Collaboration” by Bill Keck, David Kettlewell and Ardith Keck, is available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com. Website: Workingtogetheroncollaboration.com, Facebook Group- Working Together on Collaboration.
